Squish and Ouch

Today was the day for the annual squishing. My women friends will probably all agree with my comments. Actually when I arrived there I was a little shocked to find out it's been 1 1/2 years. I shamed myself for that one. For a woman, as much as this test can be life saving it is degrading. Not as much as an anal probe I'm sure but close.
My appointment was at 7pm and I arrived 15 minutes early as instructed. The place was empty. There was a note at the desk to have a seat and someone would be with me shortly. Shortly turned into 20 minutes. I read some article about Kristie Alley's weight loss. It did not really inspire me. I was half way through the "How to Tell If Your Spouse Is Cheating" article when the tech showed up and explained that she was all alone and would be right with me. Here's a robe, remove everything from the waist up and have a seat in this chair.
Ten minutes later I was being lead down the looonnnngggg hallway to doom. This woman talked more that anyone I know. It didn't take me long to figure out why she was so behind. When I'm nervous constant chatter does nothing to calm me down. So for the next 25 minutes I was "sweetie and honey". At least the flopping tray and her hands were warm. Her parting words after the ordeal were "Hopefully we won't see you until next year. If there's anything wrong we'll notify you by Friday". This is not true. I had to go back once before and it was over 10 days when they called. I thought I was in the clear that time. Enough said.

On my way home I made a stop at Walgreens as they had an item in the cosmetics department on sale I wished to purchase. This required me having to stand at the cosmetics counter and await help. The girl arrived, I asked about the item. Just then this crabby looking man walks up to the counter with a loaf of bread. I was one second away from asking the clerk to check him out first rather than look for my item when he says "Could I just pay for my loaf of bread before you start going through the entire store looking for what she wants". My first instinct was to reply "Duh...isn't that what the cosmetics counter is for" but I held my tongue and instead I turned toward him and smiled. She checked him out and as he was leaving he looked at me and said "I'm sorry miss, I didn't have to be that rude". I smiled again. He said " Don't smile, you're making me feel worse". I never uttered a word. Just smiled. Bet he thought I was some deaf mute. I prided myself in not lowering myself to combat his rudeness.