Friday, October 22, 2010

Divorce

After being married for nearly ten years, my daughter began single yesterday. Single to the point of also changing her name back to her maiden name.
I've known about the court date for a few months now and have been trying to "read" her. I often wonder how ironic life can be, in that some of her life mimics my own.

Has second thoughts before marriage- check
After a year into the marriage wants out-check
Husband begs her to stay & promises to change his ways-check
Husband cheats again and this time there's no forgiving-check
Move home with two kids-check.
Sits around moping for a while until Mom tells her to "get on with your life"-check

A few days before the court date we sat and had a heart to heart. I told her that when I divorced her dad that I was sad because it wasn't the course I thought my life would take. When I got married at 19 I was naive enough to think that life would be all rosy. I became the one that would deal with any financial and family issues while he just had a free for all. She had similar circumstances and therefore resentment begins to set in. At this point you have two choices: continue your course of being responsible and trying to get ahead on your own, or succumb to this person's immaturity and "settle" for the type of life you're in for. Turn your back on your spouse's infidelity and just be there whenever he needs you.
As a parent, I didn't want to see her marriage fall apart. Like me, she didn't reveal any of the problems leading to the split, but I could sense things weren't right. When she finally did break down and talk about some issues, it was very hard to keep my thoughts to myself. I could have ripped him apart, but then there was the fear that she'd go back and always know what I thought of her husband, so I ripped him apart to myself and friends. When she told me that she was going through with the divorce I wanted to whoop it up somewhere! I'm now very proud that she has chosen to get her life back on track and find herself again. It'll be a little bit of a rocky road for a while but I see the determination in her, and I think with a few pushes (or maybe a shove) she'll be on that track in no time.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Take the Squirrel

I'm not ready for the warm weather to move out. The forecast for the weekend is high 60's during the day and dipping down into the low 40's at night. I woke up this morning and it was a little nippy in our house as I'm not ready to close up all the windows yet. I like the crisp air and don't mind throwing on a sweatshirt. It may be time to close them at night. The cat was buried in the blankets and Sadie was all curled up on her rug this morning. I think if she could still make it up on the bed, she would have been there.

Ah, the camping weekend is upon me. 42 in the house is a little different then 42 outside. Canvas sides may not keep the chill out. I'm good with the forecast as long as rain doesn't sneak in there somewhere. 60's and sunny during the day is good. The bees may have already cut out so they won't be buzzing around every food item brought out and hopefully the days of the Asian beetles are over. Mosquito's=gone for the season.

We've had a owl hanging around our house for a while now. He sits on the basketball hoop. Usually when I leave for work he's setting off the sensor lights on the garage. It's nice that he lights the driveway for me. He may be after the abundance of rabbits and squirrels in our yard. It seems our dogs are not doing their job. On occasion you will see one of them get up and give chase to a rabbit. This morning I was almost to my car and heard the whoosh of the owls wings telling me that he was heading somewhere. He made a dive toward our front yard and swooped rabbit right up. I could do nothing but stand there and stare as the rabbit let out this horrible squeal. I wanted to yell "take the squirrel. They're the wreaking havoc on our yard", but he was gone and the rabbit was struggling. I think it was a lost cause.

Monday, October 04, 2010

I Am Just Way To Nice..Sometimes

"It's gotta be hotter than Africa in that huddle right now" actually came out of the radio announcers mouth during yesterdays Packer/Lions game. He was referring to the Lions huddle. I am not a huge fan of listening to the game on the radio but we made the wiser choice and chose Dylan's football game over the Packers. You can always DVR the Packers game and watch it later, but watching a tape of Dylan's game just wouldn't be the same as being there. The boys were a little sluggish in the first half allowing the Cowboys to score three times. After the half they scored two touchdowns and held the Cowboys. Whatever their coach said to them during half-time made them come out a different team. It was suggested that they not eat a big Sunday brunch prior to a game. They suffered their first loss 21-12 but didn't allow the Cowboys to score the entire second half. I tried to blame the loss on my mother-in-laws presence at the game. It seems every time she shows up for a football game they lose. She is banned.
The Cowboys have a very vocal and rude sideline and the coaches are pretty verbally brutal. We've experience this for the past several years. There is one woman in particular whose voice carries across the field. Just brutal.

I received a phone call this weekend from my ex-husbands soon to be ex-wife. They owe me some money and haven't been able to pay yet. She started making some excuses when I broke in and asked why it was her responsibility to pay me back. Why was she making this phone call and not him? Why is she sitting at home worrying about money and he's out spending money on his newest woman? Well, she wanted to talk to me and apologize for being a bitch to me when her and Ron first got together. In case she never sees or talks to me again, she just wanted to straighten some things out. Wanted to thank me for never suing them for child support and apologize for not being able to help out enough. This isn't her place to apologize for these things. These were his kids, his responsibility and his failure as a husband and father. I did however accept the first apology because she came into the relationship with him like Hitler and I wasted a lot of time arguing with her. Her famous quote was that she was "standing by her man". Well, look what that got her.