Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Hang On There

I think our lives may return to some normalcy. As I type this I'm desperately looking for a piece of wood to knock on. Doris is improving each day and although not completely out of the woods yet-she has a positive attitude and a goal of returning to her own home soon. Today she will be moved to the rehab floor of the hospital verses moving to a rehab center. We met the team that will be working with her and feel at ease with them.
My concerns are for when she is released from rehab and ready to go home and then wants to start her Chemo again. She was pretty weak from her surgery when she started her first round of chemo and we all thought it was to soon. Her cardiac and primary physicians are both saying no more. This will be a tough choice for her to make given that she'll be told the blood pressure issues could do her in. There hasn't been a time frame set on how long it will be until the cancer takes her. At last CT scan a month ago the tumor had not grown. The family has talked about it and each voiced their opinions. No one wants to see her in any pain. No one wants her to suffer any further damage due to blood pressure issues. This isn't our decision to make. She currently cannot recall what lead to the incident that brought her to the hospital-nor nine days of being in ICU. I guess that in itself should raise a flag to her.
I've been waiting for the worrying Doris to show up and found out yesterday that her doctor does have her on a low dose of anti-anxiety medication. She's pretty determined to get herself up and going. A direct quote "I am sick of my self pity party."
We have one more camping trip planned. As selfish as it sounds, I would like to go. We need to go. If I have to I will get one more trip in this season. It could mean the my husband and I may be braving some cold and snow-but we will go at least once more this year.

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