Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Simple Rules of Camping

I know we have some die hard campers out there so let's go through this list and see if you can add to them. They're just plain and simple rules of camping made up just to make all of our camping experiences just a little more pleasant.

#1) If you are a smoker then please be kind enough to deposit your butts into the firepit or your car ashtray. Do not make of trail of them to the bathroom either. Put them out and flush them in the toilet. Most campgrounds have ashtrays outside the bathrooms.

#2). If you bring your pet..bring a bag and pick up their droppings. Plain and simple and enough said about that one.

#3). Invest in a car charger for your cell phone. You got there in a car. Spend the $20.00 and buy a charger rather than charging your phone in the bathroom and then standing in front of the sink guarding it.

#4). Lawn chairs are for outside...not to sit on in the bathroom and watch your phone charge.

#5). Invest in a dish pan and wash your dishes at your camp site , not in the bathroom sink.

#6). If you feel the need to make blended drinks in the bathroom at least offer one to those also using the bathroom or get an electrical site, or leave your blender at home.

#7). Dispose of your own trash. Don't leave it for the next camper. Don't hide it in the bushes. Haul it to the dumpster and then throw it in. Don't lay it by the dumpster or throw it from your car on the way past.

#8) Don't go for a drunken walk at midnight and shine your flashlight into someones eyes. Don't call attention to yourself by talking in a high pitched stupid chippie girl voice.

#9). DO NOT COME INTO SOMEONE ELSE'S campsite asking for smokes. Buy your own. Take your car and drive to the store or quit!.

#10). Do Not Come into someone else's campsite after you've already been told there are not smokes to be found. Did you think we went and bought them for you?

#11). 3PM is check-out time. That means be out, not come out of your camper, stretch and begin to pick up your crap and pack up.

#12). No! you cannot park on my site. If you have too many cars on your site and I am not camping with you then you should have gotten two sites, or use the overflow lot.

#13). The most important rule of camping in my eye: WHAT IS ON MY SITE BELONGS TO ME AND THE PEOPLE I AM WITH. Do not come onto my site and steal anything from me or my fellow campers. Buy your own food, beer or whatever it is that your nasty ass can't buy yourself.

These are just some of my observations from the past camping season. Feel free to add.


Hey Jo said...

Remember to bring enough alcohol for Connie. You never want her to get mad when she runs out of Hot Sex, Awesome Orange or even Boone's Farm.

Bongos are not allowed! No Exceptions.

And last but not least.... what happens at Bong.... gets posted on our blogs. It ain't staying at Bong.

StB said...

How about... do not get in the way of seasoned campers. They know what they are doing. Offer to assist instead of sitting around doing nothing.